Bulletin From Heaven
Bulletin From Heaven
Todays TV
(Heaven - Stardate 467392-889.9)
The Heaven Channel:
00:01-06:00 Infomercials.
06:00-07:00 'The Daily Worship Hour' - Early morning worship.
07:00-08:00 'Up Here Today' - Informal early morning prayer and worship magazine - hosted by the wild and wacky Pope Joan.
08:00-08:15 'Cloud Nine' - Harp lessons for all - beginners welcome. (Lesson No. 2,192,185: Plucking the painless glissando.)
08:15-08:30 Cartoons.
08:30-09:00 'The Jeremiah Springer Show'
10:00-12:00 Film: 'Onan the Barbarian' (18)
12:00-12:30 'Judge Jude' - Heavens outspoken family court judge presides over more cases.
12:30-14:30 Film: 'Honey, I Shrunk the Yids' (15)
14:30-15:00 'Real TV' - Footage of astounding miracles.
15:30-16:00 'Sabrina the Teenage Angel' - There's mass confusion when Sabrina turns some humans into sheep...
16:00-17:00 'Babylon 5'
17:00-17:15 Early Evening News and cloud forecast- with Torquemada.
17:15-17:20 'Five minutes of fun, fun, fun!' - with mein host Pope Anacletus.
17:20-20:00 Sport - Live Formula 1 Grand Prix: Opening race of the season from Purgatory. (Subsequent programs may run late.)
20:00-21:00 Evensong (and at 20:05 the lottery results).
21:00-22:30 Film - 'The Dirty Dozen' (15)
22:30-23:30 'The Red Sandal Diaries' - Late-nite adult entertainment introduced by King David.
23:30-00:00 Late Night News, cloud forecast, prayer and flagellation with the Rt Rev Rasputin.
TOUCH THE CHARIOT
Signed: St. Peter - pp God
The Bulletin from Heaven - Serving the pious community since 4006 B.C. - now on the web!
© Copyright Martin J Burn 2000
