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Note to readers of my site: As a personal decision in light of my faith (I became a practicing Roman Catholic in 2010), I no longer identify as female.  The feelings are still there, but I have decided to control them instead of embracing them, much like one does with anger.  I am much happier as a result.

This was not forced on me; I was not coerced in any way.  I made this decision out of my own God-given free will.

If identifying as the opposite sex makes it easier for you to live through a life with this fundamental mismatch between mind and body, then that is still better than transitioning.  The purpose of this site is to provide alternatives to transition.  Mine is my faith; yours may be something else.

Out of respect for the posibility that the Christian faith may not be your ideal solution, I will leave my site up as is.  If you're concerned that becoming a Christian will force you to abandon all cross-gender thinking, please see my page "Transgender and Catholic."

If you're interested in learning about the faith, please e-mail me.  I'll be happy to answer any questions you have.

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"Is it a boy or a girl?"
"I don't know, it hasn't told us yet" --Anonymous

"There are more things in Heaven and Earth, Horatio/than are dreamt of in your philosophies." --William Shakespeare, Hamlet

Hello!

Welcome to my website.
This is for anyone who feels like a woman in a man's body but does nothing to alter their body. If you're the reverse, you can benefit, too. Actually, everyone should read it just to see the perspective.

I will be using a few words that may be new to you. Different people use these words differently, but I have chosen one definition for each word. Transgendered describes anyone whose gender identity doesn't exactly fit with their assigned gender, especially someone whose gender identity is the opposite of their biological sex. Do not confuse this with transsexual, which describes anyone who has changed their body to look like a member of the other biological sex. All transsexuals are (or once were, depending on your point of view) transgendered, but not all transgendered people are transsexual. To transition is to become a transsexual through hormones and/or surgery. A genetic woman is a woman who was born with a female body; a genetic man is defined similarly. There's also the word cisgendered, which means "non-transgendered."

I hope you find my pages useful. Please read all of them to get the most out of this site. They are updated regularly, so be sure to visit them again. Also, please send the homepage URL (http://webspace.webring.com/people/qg/girlinside123/) to anyone you think might be interested. If you have a transgender-related site, or any gender-related site, for that matter, I would be willing to link to your site if you'll link to mine.

My pages:
• Who am I? And why do I keep my male body?
• Frequently Asked Questions "Transgendered" explained in plain English in the FAQ format. If you wish to understand it or have it be understood by someone, you will find this page useful. Questions include the usual "Are you gay?" and "How do you know you're a girl?"--plus questions such as "How many people like you are there?" and "What causes your condition?" Issues such as religion and male privilege are also addressed.
• The Early Years What it was like for me growing up. Continued in The Later Years.
• WARNING! Do not change your body unless you really, really, really need to!
• Transgender and Catholic Finally, a resource for other transgender Catholics!
• Kathoey Learn all about Thailand's girls who would be stuck being boys in just about any other country.
• Famous Transgendered People Unlike many of the transsexuals we hear about, these people are known for something else. There have been transgendered people in such high places as royal families and the Vatican. These people are proof that it is possible to be transgendered without ever transitioning, and still lead a full life.
• Transgender Mascots Characters, both transgendered and otherwise, whose experience is like our own. Mostly a just-for-fun page.
• Links to other sites. Some are about transgender issues, some are about general gender issues, and some are about other topics altogether. The inclusion of a link does not constitute an endorsement of the opinions written on that site.

This site has saved five people from transition.

My other pages

• jan Sawa's Toki Pona page My page about Toki Pona, the simplest language ever created--it's possible to become fluent in less than a month. Created by Sonja Elen Kisa, who's on the Famous People page.
• All About Laadan Laadan is a language created by Dr. Suzette Haden Elgin: "by women, for women, for the specific purpose of expressing the perceptions of women." I've found that it is more expressive of my own world-view than others I have studied. (Unlike Sonja Elen Kisa, Dr. Elgin has no reason to be on the Famous People page.)
• How Do They Find Me? Some of the searches people have used to find my site are pretty interesting. Also see which pages are the most popular.

Articles

Last article added: June 18, 2008

Cultures that accept transgendered people
• Crossing Boundaries: Albania's Sworn Virgins In Albania, someone who is biologically female can choose to live as a man by taking an oath of virginity. Such a person is socially treated as a man in every way.
• Girls whose bodies masculinize at puberty 1 in 90 genetic males in the Dominican Republic have 5-alpha-reductase deficiency, which means they look like girls in every way until they turn into boys at puberty. This provides some insight into the complexities of gender identity.
• The Marsh Arabs The natives of the marshlands of Iraq accepted transgendered people as their gender of choice for thousands of years... until Saddam Hussein drained the marshlands and destroyed their way of life.
• Fa'afafine Are Useful People, says Samoan Prime Minister The fa'afafine are biologicaly male and live as women without taking hormones or getting surgery--and they are tolerated fairly well.
• Other Words for the Other-gendered Many cultures recognize gender identity variance.
• Sulawesi's Fifth Gender There's a culture on the island of Sulawesi that has five genders.
• Please call me "Miss," transgendered Thais say The kathoey are starting to demand legal recognition.

What it's like to be transgendered
• The Heterosexual Questionnaire An exercise for straight people who wish to understand what it's like to be gay. Many of the questions can be used to understand transgendered people as well. Show this to anyone who needs help understanding.
• The Trans FAQ A FAQ about being transgendered, written by a transitioner. Useful for gaining insight into those who choose to transition, but also has useful general information on transgender issues.
• A Guide to Gender Dysphoria This guide is aimed primarily at people who are not themselves transgendered, but have an interest in this area. Also has some theories as to what causes the sensation of being a woman in a man's body. Some of the info might be a bit outdated, though.
• How to Respect A Transsexual Person Useful when interacting with transsexuals. By Sonja Elen Kisa (she's mentioned on the Famous People page).

Why you shouldn't transition
• Aurora Lipscomb The story of the little girl from Westerville, Ohio, who was taken away from her parents by the Gender Police, and tortured into conforming to male norms, for being a girl in a boy's body. For some discussion on this article, click here. If anyone knows how Aurora's doing now, please let me know. This is the most recent article on her I could find.
• Sex changes are not effective, say researchers While many transitioners like to dismiss the cases of regret, these cases are more common than they like to believe. Also take a look at Mistaken identity.
• Hormones: Dream Goal Or Time Bomb? The dangers of taking female hormones.
• Federal Appeals Court: Transsexuals Have No Civil Rights Still want to transition?
• Transgenders Do Need Protection Laws Are you SURE you still want to transition?
• Transjoblessness Even in the most liberal places in the country, transsexuals still have a hard time getting good jobs. This is why so many of them have to resort to prostitution.
• University Professor Fired for Transitioning Keep in mind that university professore are usually given a lot of leeway with eccentricity.
• Special Note to Those Thinking About a Sex Change Danielle Bunton Berry regrets having had a sex change, even though she had seen herself as female in a male body since the age of 4.
• Life in Hell Prison is especially bad for transgendered people; if you break the law and still haven't had the surgery, you'll be put in with people of your birth sex. If you're going to transiton, make sure to stay on the good side of the law.
• A Stealth Life The harsh reality is that the percentage of people who could "live in stealth" (live as their desired gender without anyone knowing that they are transsexual) is miniscule, regardless of how much surgery they get. For me, the inability to live completely as a woman would defeat the purpose of transitioning.
• Torment of sex change soldier trapped in a woman's body Sandra MacDougall regrets having had sex reassignment surgery.
• How to Kill a Transperson An editorial about the many transpeople who die from discrimination.
• Don't Try This At Home I really don't recommend the do-it-yourself approach to sex-reassignment surgery...
• Male-to-Female-to-Male A letter from a male-to-female transsexual who went back into the male role.
• Rape isn't just for men anymore Male-to-female transsexuals think they can avoid being raped by being lesbians. Guess again.
• Deep-Voiced Men Have More Kids Women find men with deeper voices more attractive, and men find women with higher voices more attractive. This probably isn't much of a surprise to you, but it is a good reminder that if you transition, all the voice training in the world won't help some things.

Proof that we're not nuts
• Transsexuality Gene Link Identified This is the first real scientific proof that biological factors are involved in gender identity.
• Boy Raised As Girl Dies David Reimer, genetic male raised as a girl due to botched circumcision, committed suicide on May 4, 2004. His case shows that gender identity is at least partially innate.
• Children Learn Gender At Age 2 If you've ever wondered how children as young as 2 can feel that they were born the wrong sex...
• Left-Handed Bears & Androgynous Cassowaries Gender identity variation exists in the animal kingdom, too. Indigenous cultures have recognized this for a long time.
• Gender Identity and Phantom Genitalia Apparently men in women's bodies have a "phantom male organ," while male-to-female transsexuals who have undergone sex reassignment surgery don't.
• If you bend gender far enough, does it break? All about the misguided attempts to "cure" gender identity "disorder."
• Sex Drive In Brain, Not Hormones, Study Suggests
• German woman forced into sex change as baby Actually, she's intersexed and had "an ambiguous body part" that was surgically converted into a male organ. But her gender identity is female.

Our changing world
• Girl/Boy Interrupted A new treatment puts puberty on hold for transgender children. (After reading that article on the dangers of hormones, I'm not so sure this is a good idea.)
• Overcoming Gender Interesting food for thought: Someone at the Instititute for Ethics and Emerging Technologies has written an article arguing that gender is something humans need to overcome.
• Man Gets Pregnant Thomas Beatie has become the first female-to-male transsexual to become pregnant. For me, it is absolutely incomprehensible that someone with such a strongly male gender identity would even consider becoming pregnant. If you'd like to see it written in his own words, read Labor of Love. Mr. Beatie is so well-known that he has been mentioned as "the guy who got pregnant" on the children's show iCarly.
• Ethiopian man recognized for creating egalitarian community A 60-year-old Ethiopian farmer founded and cochairs Awra Amba, a commune where men cook, women plow, and religion has no place.
• New York Plans to Make Gender Personal Choice Things are looking up for those who wish to change gender. For discussion on the article, click here.
• The Crying Game A study finds women are judged far more harshly for crying in public than men. Is that what you thought?
• My Secret Self: A Story of Transgender Children (20/20, April 27, 2007). Also read about Riley and Jeremy.
• See Dick Be Jane This is another article about a 5-year-old girl with a male body.
• Second Nature Lucia is 10 years old; she was a boy named Luc until the second grade.
• Fatherhood 2.0 Things are starting to get a little better for fathers who want to be more active in their children' lives. Things aren't perfect, especially not for someone who wants to be a mother, but hey, it's a start.
• How To Meet An Accepting Female Partner Intended for cross-dressers, but you may find this useful, too.
• Cuba to offer free sex-change operations
• One boy, one girl--one dorm room This seems like a mistake unless one or both of the parties is gay, transgendered, or asexual.

Lots of room for improvement
• The Bullying Never Stops Feminine men in the workplace are routinely sexually harassed by more masculine men--and the problem's just getting worse.
• Maternal Chauvinism WARNING! If you decide to have kids, this is what you may be up against! Whether or not you agree with everything the article says (I don't), the message is clear: Motherhood isn't really much of an option for most women in men's bodies... unless you raise children on your own.
• Change Sex Or Die You think we have it bad in the United States? Be glad you don't live in Iran.
• Boys Will Be Boys - Or Else The title says it all. While that pretty much sums up the situation in most countries, things are particularly bad in Kuwait.

Miscellaneous
• 36 Methods of Mathematical Proof Ever seen any of these used to prove that you can't possibly be transgendered?
• The Bearded Person Jennifer Miller is a genetic woman with a beard. Most women like her get electrolysis, but she refuses.

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Questions? Comments? Email me at girlinside123@yahoo.com.

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