Notices / Signs

TRUST IN GOD/HAVE FAITH IN THE LORD
SECURITY BY FRANKLIN BURGLAR ALARM, INC.

Bingo Friday night at 8:00 pm
Quickies Thursday at 7:30pm.

ON A CHURCH DOOR: This is the gate of Heaven, enter all ye through this door
Notice underneath: This door is kept locked because of draft, please use side door

A large poster outside London's St. Paul's, "Christ Is Coming!"
Right below it another sign read, "Please do not obstruct these gates."

The Anglican Church Welcomes You
The Premises are Protected by Guard Dogs

The sermon this morning: "Jesus Walks on the Water."
The sermon tonight: "Searching for Jesus."

Lenten Worship Sermon: The Surest Road to Hell
Below that: "Transportation Available. Please call before noon Saturday."

*****

The peace-making meeting scheduled for today has been canceled due to a conflict.

Last time we asked for prayer for Jerry Butler's foot.
After nine months of various treatments, it's finally all gone.

The Ladies Aid Society of the United Church will hold its annual potluck dinner Saturday in the church hall. Dinner will be gin at 5:30 p.m

During the service, Francis Bollinger, chorister, aroused the audience.

The priest married John and Susan in the Rectum of the church.

This week's youth discussion will be on teen suicide in the church basement.

ad: "This is the First Baptist Church where you are welcome"

Men's prayer breakfast. No charge, but your damnation will be gratefully accepted.

Bertha Belch, a missionary from Africa, will be speaking tonight at Calvary Methodist. Come hear Bertha Belch all the way from Africa.

Would the congregation please note that the bowl at the back of church labeled "For the Sick" is for monetary donations only.

Visit our Christian bookstore, where Jesus is King and carries every translation of the Holy Bible.

The 1991 Spring Council retreat will be hell May 10 & 11.

The third verse of "Blessed Assurance" will be sung without musical accomplishment.

Couples should contact the pastor at least six months in advance of marriage, even if a firm hate has been established.

The Over 60s Choir will be disbanded for the summer with the thanks of the entire church.

Pastor is on vacation. Massages can be given to church secretary

Eight new choir robes are currently needed, due to the addition of new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles, and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will go to cripple children.

Our choir sang in a broadcast from Minneapolis. It was nice to hear them and realize they were nearly a thousand miles away.

At the annual all-women's church party, Mrs. Dixon will give the medication.

A new loudspeaker system has been installed in the church. It was given by one of our members in honor of his wife.

The senior choir invites any member of the congregation who enjoys sinning to join the choir.

During the Burning Bowel Service you are given the opportunity to let go and release anything unwanted in your life.

Postlude: "Rejoice Ye Pure in Heat."

Next Thursday, there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

It would be a great help towards keeping the churchyard in good order if others would follow the example of others who clip the grass on their own graves.

Thursday night-Potluck Supper. Prayer and medication to follow.

This afternoon, there will be a meeting in the south and north end of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

Tomorrow's lecture will be "Recycling-Our Garbage Is a Resource." Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our church and community.

Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "Hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

Twenty-two members were present at the church meeting held at the home of Mrs Marsha Crutchfield last evening. Mrs Crutchfield and Mrs Rankin sang a duet The Lord Knows Why.

Tuesday at 4 P.M. there will be an ice cream social. Will ladies, giving milk, please come early

Wednesday the Ladies Literary Society will meet. Mrs Johns will sing 'Put Me In My Little Bed' accompanied by the Pastor.

Thursday At 5 p.m. there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers Club. All wishing to become Little Mothers will please meet the Minister in his study.

This being Easter Sunday, we will ask Mrs Jackson to come forward and lay an egg on the altar.

On Sunday a special collection will be taken to defray the expenses of the new carpeting. All wishing to do something on the carpet, please come forward and get a piece of paper.

The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind.They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be "What is Hell?" Come early and listen to our choir practise.

Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on Oct. 24th in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

This week's saints include a Swedish woman (Bridget), a Jewess from the Holy Land (Mary, God's Mother). Bridget was a wife and mother. Mary was a virgin and virgin mother. If they could do it, so can we.

This afternoon there will be a meeting in the south and north end of the church. Children will be baptized at both ends.

The Rev. Merriwether spoke briefly, much to the delight of the audience.

The pastor will preach his farewell message, after which the choir will sing, "Break Forth Into Joy."

The choir will meet at the Larsen house for fun and sinning.

During the absence of our pastor, we enjoyed the rare privilege of hearing a good sermon when J. F. Stubbs supplied our pulpit.

Will the ladies of the Willing Workers who have towels which belong to the kitchen please bring them to the church on Friday as we need them for supper?

Next Sunday Mrs. Vinson will be soloist for the morning service. The pastor will then speak on "It's a Terrible Experience."

Due to the Rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice .

The service will close with "Little Drops of Water." One of the men will start quietly, and the rest of the congregation wiU join in.

Offertory: "Jesus Paid It All" .

Today-Christian Youth Fellowship House Sexuality Course, 1 p.m.-8 p.m. Please park in the rear parking lot for this activity.

The music for today's service was all composed by George Friedrich Handel in celebration of the 300th anniversary of his birth.

On a church postcard:
0 I have received Jesus Christ as my Lord and Saviour.
0 I would like a personal call.

The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare's Hamlet in the church basement on Friday at 7 p.m. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

The concert held in Fellowship Hall was a great success. Special thanks are due to the minister's daughter, who laboured the whole evening at the piano, which as usual fell upon her.

Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say, "hell" to someone who doesn't care much about you.

A song fest was hell at the Methodist church Wednesday.

On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: GOD IS GOOD Dr. Hargreaves is better.

Potluck supper: prayer and medication to follow.

Don't let worry kill you off - let the church help.

Mrs Betty Larkin is poorly this spring. Her face is much missed in church, it being always there when she is able to be present.

Weight Watchers will meet Tuesday at 7 pm at the First Presbyterian Church.
Please use the large double door at the side entrance.

Church Bizarre Sale. Refreshments. Saturday, June 24. 9 A.M.

A minister addressing a luncheon club was warned by the programme chairman:
Something's gone wrong with the soundsystem. You'll have to speak up, preacher. The agnostics in this room are just terrible

We should be as much concerned about those in spiritual danger as those in physical danger. If I saw that Mrs Smith here had fallen into a canal I would jump into the water, pull her out and give her artificial insemination.

"This is my second sermon on sin. Last week's point sermon emphasized six points and went overtime, so today's sermon on sin will be pointless."

A pastor in Alabama , "Please don't let anything prevent you from missing this wonderful picnic.

"Greater love hath no man than this, that he lay down his wife for his friend."

After the service, entertainment will follow at the local cemetary.

From a Vespers liturgy: Keep us toady, Lord, without sin.

We want to extend our sympathies to the Stock family. Mrs. Stock (Valerie) died suddenly last year and the same happened to her husband (Michael) who was buried this week from St. Anselm.”

Support our church rummage sale: a good opportunity to get rid of anything not worth keeping but too good to throw away. Bring your husband.

Please bring nonparishable foods to the church tonight.

The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Beiser, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Julius Beiser.

Low self-esteem support group. 7-8:30 P.M. Eastview Baptist Church.
Please use the back door.

Today will be a Called Council Meeting fight after the church service. Come and vote!

In November, Mr. Larkin passed out and explained the Finance Committee's budget forms for the 1994-95 church year.

Monday, 11:30 AM to 8:30 Rain or shine. Pancake luncheon and supper under the auspices of the Sisterhood. All the pancakes you can eat!
Thursday, 7:45 PM Choir rehearsal. There will be no meeting of the Sisterhood this month on account of the Pancake luncheon and supper.

Among the topics to be discussed by the church women's group will be abortion, family life, and Youth in Asia.

A massage by the Rev. MT. Stuart, of the Pilgrim Holiness Church, will follow the singing.

Fall Apple Pie Sale-Made from the ladies of the church.

Family Whorship Service

We are happy to announce that we have secured the services of Rev. Struthers as our organist and choirmaster. He will also help with the youth club. We could not get a better man.

Kerry Bengston is a 10-ear member of the church.

Please join us for our Christmas concert and sin-along.

One of our series of Lenten studies will be a sex-week study of The Screwtape Letters.

Please remember, Feed the Hungry needs any nonparishable food. Newburg Church tries to assist in serving a luncheon for the families of church members who have died immediately following the funeral.

The outreach committee has enlisted 25 visitors to make calls on people who are not afflicted with any church.

NOTICE: I wish to thank anyone who so kindly assisted in my husband's death.

NOTICE TO THE RESIDENCE OF THE WILTSHIRE PARISH: Due to increasing problems with litter, louts & vandals, we must ask everyone with relatives buried in the graveyard to do their best to keep them in order.

On behalf of Barbara Rutledge and her family, our sincere thanks go out to those sending flowers, cards and contributing to the death of her husband.

A college friendship that began a year ago ended in matrimony yesterday.

“Dedication and commencement of Ecumenical Stud Groups on the theme `Growing Together.' ”
[From a church newsletter, Greater Manchester, England. Submitted by John Ferguson, Birmingham.]

Conference: "The cost for attending the Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals."

Our youth basketball team is back in action Wednesday at 8 PM in the recreation hall. Come out and watch us kill Christ the King.

Miss Charlene Mason sang "I will not pass this way again", giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

Barbara remains in the hospital and needs blood donors for more transfusions. She is also having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.

Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new tithing campaign slogan last Sunday: "I Upped My Pledge - Up Yours."

The church will host an evening of fine dining, superb entertainment and gracious hostility.

This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn sing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

**********************************

An edition of the Bible published in 1632 by Barker and Lucas omitted the word not from the seventh commandment, making it read 'Thou shalt commit adultery'.
In 1716 'sin no more'was printed as 'sin on more'.
In 1717 in an Oxford edition of the Bible, a chapter heading for Luke appeared as "The ParabIe of the Vinegar."
A 1923 version produced the stern admonition "A man may not marry his grandmother's wife".