Dear love.

I miss you.

You know it and that's the reason why I think that somehow you may understand. That makes me so scared to think that you might not understand me at all - if so, you could never love me. Though you told me you would never love me. But never is a promise.

From the first day on I saw you, I was immediately captured. I was the perfect picture of an unpossessable girl, the kind that you'll never have entirely under your will. I was so independant and so indifferent. I already had a glimpse of love, but when I saw you on this cold sunny day, I forgot it all. It was so strong. I had fallen at your feet. It was hurt.

It's been four years now, and I still hurt. My body is full of the scars that will never totally heal. They itch and bleed when you're not there. The more the time pass, the more they become numerous, and that's frightening the way you can hurt me faraway or so close. You never asked for this love - nor me.
There's so many things I want to tell you, but I'm scared of the way you could react. You're so laid back and so funny sometimes, that I'm feeling so good ; but I'm afraid of telling you my whole thoughts. I only tell you a third of what I could say. I want you to guess what I mean behind my tired eyes. But please don't ever shout at me again, you could kill me for good. And where would you be without your little faerie around you ? Have you ever asked yourself this question ? I don't think ... you might not like the answer you'd give to yourself.

Now you know what I'm through day by day - being scared of your own self.

I will take care of you, and you have to take care of me. That's always when we broke up that reciprocity that things gone wrong. We should keep and tie ourselves to it. This is the most tender handcuffs I have ever been put on ...

I'm here for you ... forever.

Your fallen angel.
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