Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace

Montana

 

A/N: This is pretty much set after Blue Moon, but there’s some stuff that has taken place from OB, like Edward and Anita’s conversation about her not knowing an uncomplicated fuck if it bit her in the ass, (or something similar. :) )

 

 

1

 

        “Have you heard the unpleasant news?” questioned the vampire sitting in front of me, behind his desk. We were in his office at Guilty Pleasures. Jean-Claude was wearing another of those ridiculously frilled shirts, perfectly pressed and situated on him. I stood with my arms crossed, my back against the wall. I had an idea what the vampire was getting at, but I shook my head no just the same, wanting to hear Jean-Claude’s side of it. “No?” the vampire asked, an amused smile on his lips. He didn’t believe me. I may not like Jean-Claude, but he wasn’t stupid. “Anita and Richard are to wed, in two weeks. This is quite distressing for me, as I’m sure you can imagine.”

 

Distressing for him? I raised a skeptical eyebrow. He had no idea. I actually had an idea about the real reason she was marrying Richard, and it had little to do with love. And of course I didn’t want Anita to marry the werewolf, probably even more than Jean-Claude. Every time I even thought about it, it hurt, in a place I had long thought to be dead or numb. But I wasn’t going to off the groom because the vampire got jealous. I’m sure it would pay very well, but if Anita ever found out… I’m dead inside, except to Anita. It used to bother me, hell, it still does bother me, but she is the one person I am not desensitized to. To have her never speak to me again over Richard’s death would be more painful than a bullet through the chest.

 

“If I kill Richard it will endanger both Anita and you,” I pointed out. “I could care less if you fell over and died, Jean-Claude, but I won’t risk Anita.” The part I didn’t say was because I loved her.

 

“Oui, this I know,” said Jean-Claude. “Never fear, I do not want to kill Richard. That is not what I have called this meeting for.”

 

“Then what do you want?” I asked, getting impatient. Jean-Claude smiled knowingly. GOD I hate him. The monster I wanted to kill the most, and I couldn’t. Damn him.

 

“A day before the wedding I wish for you to kidnap Anita, and bring her to my estate in France. It will look as if she developed cold feet, as these Americans say, and ran.” He was going to try to win her over again. As Anita says—gag me with a spoon.

 

“I like you even less than the werewolf, Jean-Claude. What makes you think I would deliver Anita to you, in a foreign country, no less?”

 

“I think you will if I pay you enough,” the vampire answered, folding his lace clad hands over the blotter on his desk. He smiled, a small irritating smirk. He thinks he rules the world with money, that if he pays anyone enough, he could get them to do whatever he wanted. Many rich and powerful people have that mentality. It wasn’t limited to just egotistical vampires. I shook my head, not approving of the plan. “You are the only person who could do it easily and quickly,” said Jean-Claude, almost pleadingly. There was an uncontrolled note that slipped through the mask. He was getting desperate. “You will be paid handsomely, I assure you.”

       

Of course I would. I didn’t do work for anything less than getting “paid handsomely.” But we were still talking about kidnapping Anita. Damn.

 

“She’s made her decision, Jean-Claude. Get over it.” She didn’t choose the vampire, and she didn’t choose me. That was that. I headed for the door, my coat waving around me like a cape.

 

“This would win you more time as well, Edward, if I can convince her to postpone or even cancel the wedding.”

 

I froze, shoulders stiff, and turned to look at Jean-Claude. I was surprised on the inside, but cold on the out. I studied the vampire. Did he know? “What?” I demanded.

 

There was a flash of triumph in the vampire’s eyes that he had caught my attention again. “I said 4 million dollars. Two million for the kidnapping, and another two will be placed in your account when Anita is delivered safely to me in France.”

 

Four million dollars, for a child’s play job. It wasn’t killing Anita, it was preventing her from getting married. If I was careful, she would never even know it was me. But it was still Anita. I shouldn’t. I turned to go back out the door, when another sudden thought occurred to me. If I didn’t do it, Jean-Claude might hire someone else. There were very seedy people in my business that Jean-Claude might misjudge, that I did not want within three states of Anita. Shit. I had to do it. I turned to face the vampire full on, crossing my arms.  “I want 50,000 now, as a down payment.”

 

Jean-Claude nodded. “Consider it done, mon ami. It will be transferred to your account.”

 

I narrowed my eyes at him. “Don’t call me that.”

 

“Do you know what I said?” Jean-Claude asked, a trace of humor in his voice. I knew. I can speak five languages fluently besides English, and French was one of them. French, Spanish, German, Italian, and Chinese. There are a handful of others I can speak choppily, but not well.

 

My narrowed eyes, they turned to an icy glare, annoyed at his attempts to display superiority. “Oui, je te comprende, et si j'etais toi, je serais plus prudent de quoi je dis.” A translation; yes, I understand you, and if I were you I would be more careful of what I say.

 

Jean-Claude blinked a few times, surprised. I knew my accent was perfect, I could make it come and go as easily as my country drawl, or any other element of acting I wished to accomplish. “You speak very well, Monsieur,” said Jean-Claude, covering his surprise. I noticed he didn’t call me “friend.” Good. He never earned it. I nodded. “So do we have a deal?”

 

“Yes, we have a deal.” I fought not to growl as I said the next, “I will have Anita in Marseilles on April 15.”

 

Jean-Claude raised an eyebrow. Ah, unease in the great vampire. This was getting better. “You know where my estate is?” asked Jean-Claude, pretending as if it were a trivial matter.

 

“Of course,” I answered, stepping out the door, leaving him with a bewildered look on his face. That might make this all worth it.

 

2

 

I spent the whole next two weeks planning this out. I had observed her secretly this whole last week in the morning. She had been getting up much earlier than usual this week, around 4:30, probably nervous about the wedding. But no one ever shows up at the house before 9:00, which gave me much more time than I needed. I also noticed Richard was not sleeping over. Trouble in Paradise?

 

I would slip a drug into her coffee beans the two nights before the wedding. She would drink it the morning, and pass out, for approximately 12 hours, according to the drug I would use. I would be able to move in, pick her up, and move out before anyone ever had a clue she was gone. Jean-Claude’s private plane would be waiting to take us to Marseilles, about a 9 ½ hour flight. I would take her to Jean-Claude’s place, and the whole thing would be done in less than 12 hours. Anita would never know it was me. She would wake up pissed at Jean-Claude, and that suited me just fine.

 

***

 

I looked up at the house. Not a single light was on, I had watched Anita go to bed hours ago. It was 2:00 in the morning, I was finally ready to make my move, finally confident she was asleep. I picked the lock and silently made my way into the kitchen, listening for any sign of Anita waking up. I deftly found the container that held her favorite coffee beans, the ones she had used all this week. I slipped the packet of the clear tasteless odorless drug out of my pocket, and poured it in, shaking it up well. The words “Night night, Nita” kept running through my mind. I shook my head, trying to rid myself of the thought. The drug would just knock her out, but it wouldn’t have any other harmful aftereffects.

 

I closed up the coffee, placing it back in the cabinet just as I found it. The sudden sound of a creaking stair made me rush for the shadows of the kitchen. I made it through the doorway to the hall just in time, as Anita entered through the mud room. She didn’t bother with the lights, trusting her night vision.

 

I watched her from the doorway, she was in her pajamas, a t-shirt and sweat pants. It was too cold outside still for shorts. She crossed a moon beam, and stopped to look out the window at the half moon, no doubt thinking about marrying a werewolf. Her hair was messy from sleeping, that curled mass sticking up here and there in unruly tufts. And she had never been more beautiful. God I loved her. That one night we had spent together would haunt me for the rest of my life.

 

I turned away from the doorway, resting my back against the wall. A sensory memory so strong it almost hurt took me over, making me shudder. I felt like banging my head against the wall. How had I let her go? Why had I let her go? Because I couldn’t keep her, if she didn’t want to stay. It wasn’t that she had wanted to go that was eating me up, it was the reason why. When I thought I could look at her without rushing forward and taking her in my arms, I glanced around the door jam to see her finish a glass of water, and head back up to bed.

 

I quickly made my way to the door. I was stopped when I heard Anita’s voice, up in her room. Quietly walking up the stairs, I looked in on Anita. She was tossing in her sleep, all the covers were thrown in the floor. I only recognized some words from her sleep-jibberish. “Damn vampire,” and, “Edward.” To hear her say my name in her sleep was like a dagger through the heart. I must have made some involuntary noise, because even before she was truly awake I was staring down the barrel of the browning. I immediately ducked behind the wall. I could watch her in a mirror in her room through the doorway, but I knew she couldn’t see me.

 

When Anita realized she was pointing her gun at empty air it went back into the headboard rig, and she laid back down. “I almost wish I had something to shoot,” I heard her grumble. This made a smile cross my expression. Anita had that reflex tuned to perfection, and she was going to marry a werewolf who thought she was too violent. Ye gods. I quietly walked down the stairs, and out of the house. “See you in a few hours,” I said in a hushed whisper, glancing up at Anita’s window.

 

3

 

Through my binoculars I watched Anita walk into the kitchen to brew her first pot of coffee of the day. She was already fully dressed and fully armed, the browning in it’s black holster stuck out like a beacon against her red polo shirt. The firestar was in the front of her pants, and the knife sheaths were in place at her wrists. I knew the guns were her security blanket, something familiar the day before she did something scary and new. Well don’t worry, Anita darling, you wont be getting married day after tomorrow. You’ll be in France. With a vampire I hate. This was beginning to make less and less sense the more I thought about it.

 

Anita finished her first cup of coffee, and slowly sunk down onto the floor, by the kitchen table. It was time to move in. I pulled into the driveway with my black Chevy Blazer. I disposed of the drugged coffee and coffee beans in the garbage disposal, so no one else would drink the tainted brew. I picked Anita up in my arms, and carried her out of the house, setting her gingerly down in the backseat of the blazer. I didn’t bother to disarm her, I would let her keep her weapons. Maybe she would shoot the vampire when she woke up. That would be nice. After all, he was just paying me for the delivery, not a safe delivery.

 

I got her onto Jean-Claude’s private plane, situating her on one of the pull down beds. Even these had silk sheets on them. God, that vampire was obsessed.

 

Even though she was passed out, she looked as if she were in a peaceful sleep. I felt like a traitor, whisking her away like this. Come on Edward, its just a job. You don’t feel anything, remember? A sudden phrase she often used popped up in my head. “You don’t hand other humans over to the monsters.” I shook my head, trying to clear my thoughts of the matter. But I couldn’t.

 

I found myself walking towards the cockpit, involuntarily, it almost seemed. “Pilot?”

 

“Yeah?” he asked, looking over some charts.

 

“I’ve just spoken with Jean-Claude, and there has been a slight change in plans. We are going to Denver, Colorado.”

 

“It’s ok with Jean-Claude? You’re sure he’s okayed it?”

 

I nodded yes, lying easily. Money or no money, my allegiances were to Anita, not the frog vampire. The pilot nodded as well, and pulled out a different set of charts. As I walked back to sit in one of the white egg chairs the engines fired up, and we were on our way.

 

It had been a while since I had been to the hideaway in Colorado. It would be nice to see the place again.

 

4

 

The plane started to lurch into a turn an hour and a half later, arousing my suspicious nature. I heard a high pitched pleading voice coming from the cockpit, that didn’t sound like the pilot at all. But as I neared closer, I saw it was him, pleading with the radio. “I swear, Jean-Claude, I didn’t know he was lying! Put yourself in my shoes, wouldn’t you listen?”

 

“You have failed me, Alexander, and I will not forget it,” crackle Jean-Claude’s voice over the radio.

 

“No, please, I sw—” I hit the pilot on the back of the head, rendering him unconscious. I pushed him out of the seat and took over flying the plane, turning us back around towards Colorado. We had about a half hour left of air time.

 

Jean-Claude caught on to what had happened, because he asked, “So what exactly is in Denver, Edward?” he asked, obviously irritated by my change in plans.

 

“Not you, for a start,” I answered, steering on course. Learning how to fly a plane was just a basic part of my training. Piece of cake.

 

“I should have known you would do something like this,” he expostulated.

 

“Yeah, its kinda funny. It took me a while to remember how much I don’t like you.”

 

“I will get her back, Edward. You cannot hide forever.”

 

“Jean-Claude, if I don’t want to be found, you won’t find me. I guarantee it.”

 

“I —” I flipped off the radio, cutting the vampire off in mid sentence. Within 15 minutes of landing in the small planes airfield I called the rental car agency, arranging for a car to meet me out there. A truck, actually. We might have some off-roading ahead of us.

 

I landed the plane, and somehow got Anita into the white Chevy Silverado without anyone noticing the unconscious woman in my arms. I checked on the pilot. He would wake up in thirty minutes or so. I guess he could fly the plane back, or stay here, or do what ever. It didn’t matter. I was gone.

 

5

 

I started up the truck. Dual exhaust, the sweet sound sent a pleasant shiver down my spine. It was mostly a guy thing, I believe, but the truck did sound good. I drove for an hour and a half up into the mountains, till I reached my old cabin. The outside looked shabby and in desperate need of repair. The inside didn’t look much better. But it didn’t matter, it was all a decoy. Holding Anita in a fireman’s carry, I entered a key code in a hidden panel on the log wall, opening a hole in the floor, revealing a set of modern concrete stairs.

 

Ah yes, my little mountain getaway. Once down the stairs with Anita I hit a button to close the floor again. I weaved through a series of long passageways to make my way to the living room. I set Anita down on the couch.  It was cold in here. I pressed a button that started a fire in the fire place, and made my rounds through the huge hideout to activate all the heaters. It looked like it would snow on the drive up here, oh goody.

 

I got back to the living room, and Anita was still sleeping. She had about six more hours of downtime left. Maybe less, I wasn’t sure what effects the marks had on her metabolism.

 

I plopped down in my favorite arm chair, and surveyed the familiar room. It was a wonder I didn’t live down here, it was one of the few places I knew of that was absolutely safe. I fell asleep with my feet being warmed by the fire, my last sarcastic thought, how homey.

 

 

6

 

I woke up to the sound of the hammer of a gun being clicked back. “Did you have a nice nap?” I asked Anita, not even bothering to open my eyes.

 

“Where the hell are we?” she demanded. I opened one eye, then the other. The browning was pointed square at me. Maybe I should have disarmed her. No, then she wouldn’t trust me.

 

“We are in Colorado, in one of my safe houses,” I answered truthfully. I stood up to stretch, the gun still following me.

 

“And what the hell is going on?”

 

“I kidnapped you,” I answered. Her eyes narrowed into a glare.

 

“You what?”

 

“You heard me. Put away the gun, Anita, we both know you’re not going to shoot me.”

 

“We do?”

 

I smiled at her irritation. “Yes, because if you shoot me you will never get out of here. I’m the only one in the world who knows the codes. You could live here for about five years all alone by yourself before the food ran out. I don’t know about you, but starving to death doesn’t sound pleasant to me.”

 

Anita holstered the gun with an angry movement of her arm. “I didn’t think you would pull this shit, Edward.”

 

A harsh laugh escaped my lips. “Don’t worry, I won’t be keeping you here forever.”

 

“How long will you be keeping me here? I have a wedding to participate in,” she said, her voice filled with venom, looking directly in the eye.

 

I crossed my arms, raising an eyebrow. “Don’t you think it’s unfair to Richard to marry him just to prove something?” I questioned, a thread of anger leaking through into my voice.

 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said, but not looking me in the eye. “I love Richard. He loves me.” Not as much as I love you, I thought to myself.

 

“You can lie to yourself, but not to me.”

 

“You’re just jealous, Edward! We had one night, that’s it! Get over it! One uncomplicated fuck!” The words were harsh, but I could see the tears in her eyes.

 

Where the hell did that come from? This hit me like a slap in the face. Is that all it was for her? “What?”

 

“Well that’s what it was for you, wasn’t it? That’s what you told me I needed, and you gave it to me. Right? End of story?” She searched my face, and I could see her surprise, when she saw my pain.

 

Looking her directly in the eyes, I answered, “That night, I made love to you, Anita. I gave myself over, body and soul. I thought you would know, but I guess I was wrong.”

 

Now it was Anita’s turn to look like she was hit in the face with a hammer. Then her shoulders tensed, her hands balling into fists. She was turning her confusion into anger, like she always does. “You are the consummate actor, Edward. How can I ever believe anything you say?”

 

“I guess you’ll just have to trust me.”

 

“Trust you? You kidnapped me!” We were to the brink of shouting now.

 

“Yeah, well I had a damn good reason to do it!”

 

“What? Did someone pay you? ‘Always finish a job Edward’, is that what this was?”

 

I narrowed my eyes at her. “Your beloved vampire Jean-Claude paid me to do it.” She opened her mouth to probably yell at me, but I silenced her, placing a finger over her lips. “I had to take it, because if I didn’t, someone else would for the kind of money he was paying. Someone might have taken the job that would have rathered hurt you than hand you over to the vampire. I—”

 

“So what? Is Jean-Claude going to pick me up here?”

 

I shook my head no. “You didn’t let me finish. He wanted me to take you to his little estate in France, where lord knows how long he would have kept you until you gave in.”

 

“I wouldn’t have given in.”

 

“You always do with him, don’t give me that.” She glared at me, but didn’t protest the words she knew were true. “So I brought you here instead, where you can stay until I’m sure Jean-Claude’s not going to pop another fanged rabbit out of his top hat. Ok?”

 

I collapsed into the arm chair, crossing my arms as I looked up at her. She sat down slowly on the couch, letting out a long sigh. She rested her head in her hands, her elbows on her knees. When she finally looked back to me, she asked, “Is it true? What you said, about…you know. About us?”

 

I sighed as well, leaning forward in my chair so my elbows were resting on my knees too, my hands clasped. “Every word, Anita.”

 

Another sigh escaped her lips. “I’m sorry I hurt you, Edward.” She paused. “I just seem to have a knack for hurting people I care about.” She lifted her head, staring into nothing, or maybe the fire. “The morning I woke up next to you, it felt so good at first. But then I started to feel like a slut. There was yet another man I had given myself to, lying there beside me. Then I began to think about what you had said, about the uncomplicated fuck. I began to think the whole thing had been an act, that you had put on the feeling and emotions to give me what I wanted that night.”

 

“I would never take advantage of you, Anita.”

 

“I know, Edward, that’s not what I was saying. I never thought of it like that. But I guess knowing that we had had sex, and that I loved you but thinking you didn’t love me, threw me for a mental loop. And I guess when I ran to Richard and told him I wanted to get married, I did it because I knew he would accept, and I would finally have someone I would be with the rest of my life, whether I loved him or not. I would stop bouncing around, and I would stop feeling like such a slut.”

 

I blinked a few times at her explanation. “Did I do something to make you think it was an act?”

 

Anita shook her head. “No, Edward. It was so…complete, and amazing, that I guess I thought it was too good to be true. You’re such a good actor, sometimes I don’t know what to believe. You never said, ‘I love you.’ I guess I singled that out as my big clue to stand on.”

 

I tapped my forehead with my folded hands a few times, frustrated. “God, Anita, I can’t change what I am, but I can’t change it that I love you either. There, I said it. And I mean every word of it.”

 

“After I just pulled this crap with you? How can I believe that?” There was a silent tear running down her cheek.

 

I moved in front of her, on my knees so we were on the same level. I took her hands in mine, kissing each one in turn. “Holding you, I hold everything that matters to me, Anita. I still love you.” I looked into those brown eyes, pleading with her to believe me.

 

“I love you too, Edward,” she professed, wrapping her arms around my neck. I held her to me like she was the last sane thing in my world, arms around her waist, burying my face in her hair.

 

Maybe minutes, maybe hours passed like this. I didn’t know. I didn’t care. Anita was the first to pull away. “I have to call off the wedding, again,” she said, a small ironic smile on her lips. “I don’t think he will ever talk to me again.”

 

“Not such a bad thing,” I said with a smirk, brushing my lips on hers. She made an inarticulate sound, leaning into to me. She slid off the couch, pushing me to the floor, her lips claiming mine all the while. Not another word was uttered about Richard for hours as we made love for the second time before the fire. The shadows cast over her from the flickering flames brought her pale skin to life, and she was never more beautiful to me.

 

HOME   FANFICTION