|My gender issues and my personal thoughts...|
|Please Note: These are NOT presented as FACTS. These are merely my personal thoughts and views on where I am at this point in my life. If you are strictly seeking facts and not rhetoric, please see my links page for some wonderful websites.|
|Who Am I?
I am not a woman nor am I a man - I am me. My physical body - my 'sex'- is that of a woman's. My brain and my soul are just that: mine. At one point, I thought I might simply be a female-to-male transgendered person, the male side of me VERY strong. But the more I thought, the deeper I delved into my pysche, the clearer it all became. 'Male' and/or 'female' were too cut-and-dried, too confining - I am simply me.
What does it mean to be me?
It means living my life the way I want. It means being who I am. Names and pronouns are unimportant to me at this point. Biologically speaking, I am a mother. Giving birth and raising my three children are experiences that I would never trade for anything. But, as a label, I answer to 'Mommy' and 'Daddy.' (Alana answers only to 'Mommy' - as that is what she is now.) From the time I was 12 or 13, I had two mothers - my mother Martha and her partner Barbara. I have been blessed with not one but two mothers. My children will grow up with the knowledge that gender is not exclusive to male and female.
A or B? Hell, why not C, D, E? Or maybe AB or BE?
Gender is what you make of it - it's what you feel on the inside. If you feel yourself to be completely male or female, that is your choice and your choice alone. If you feel like both, that is your choice and your choice alone. If you feel like no gender applies to you, that is your choice and your choice alone. If you feel like someone totally different - someone who goes beyond the traditional boundaries - that is your choice and your choice alone.
(One thing I absolutely MUST point out: Gender is not always a matter of choice. What I mean when I say 'it is your choice' is this - it is your choice as to whether you reconcile your body and your gender. For some, it's the only choice - the alternative being death, usually suicide.)
We are Human Beings too!
When describing those like me - who feel like their gender(s) is/are not quite male OR female - I don't use the term 'someone' lightly. While gender in its literary form is a concept, it is a HUMAN concept - one that is, more or less, integral to one's sense of self, one's identity. It is for this reason that I do NOT use the term 'something' to denote gender. 'Something' denotes an object or a concept, and in the given context, it brings about the appearance that those like me are 'things' and not humans.
We are human beings who have, for one reason or another, thrown out the traditional gender roles and genders in favor of something truly unique - the ability and freedom to be ourselves. We deal with all the issues and feel all the emotions that every other human being does. (I used 'something' here to denote the words 'ability' and 'freedom' by the way.)
Once again, these are simply my views, thoughts, etc, and are NOT to be presented or taken as FACT and/or the common views of others in the GLBT community.