| My Childhood |
| I was born on Thursday, November 16, 1976, in Birmingham, Alabama. My parents and I moved to Florence, Alabama when I was three, and that is where my younger brother was born. Growing up, I attended the First Christian Church with my parents, occasionally going to a Baptist Church with my grandparents. I was your typical tomboy - playing with boy's toys, playing ball in the yard, climbing, rough-housing, etc. As far as clothing, I honestly didn't care either way. It wasn't until my brother started Cub Scouts that I started to feel a bit "off." I envied him greatly. I was a Brownie Scout before, and when I saw him getting to do things like camping, hiking, and the Pinewood Derby, I was horribly jealous. My only thought was: "and I wasted all that time doing things like making Christmas decorations out of yarn and popsicle sticks?" My dad was a Pack Leader while my brother was in Cub Scouts, and I used to love nothing more than to go the Methodist Church with them for the meetings. I remember seething inside as I watched all the boys, wanting more than anything to be like them, to be 'one of the guys.' Growing up, I had a close friend, a girl. Around the age of 9, we were playing pretend (roleplay) one day as boyfriend and girlfriend. I was the boyfriend. Nothing had ever felt so good and natural to me. Fast forward to now: I'm 26, will be 27 in November. I've been married twice - this second time being the last, as I couldn't imagine living life without Alana. I've had 3 children - 11, 2, and 3 (as of this writing). I love them all more than anything in this world, and I would never go back if I could be male back then. However, several months ago, things started coming to the surface. Feelings that I couldn't explain surged through me, scaring me to death because of the implications that they held. I wanted to be a man. More than anything. Inside, I was a man...and it drove me insane to know that who I saw myself as and who others saw me as were not the same people. After much soul-searching and long talks with Alana, I finally accepted that I am transgendered. I am a man trapped in a woman's body, essentially. That is where I am now. Alana herself is going through this as well, being a MtF transgendered person. We both are indescribably lucky, as most TS/TG people lose everything, including their spouses. We are only open to a few friends and family, but we are also making friends now as Alana and Austin, and nothing feels more natural than that. |