1013 ways to get rid of Diana Fowley

Book her on Millenium for a season...(sorry Mil fans)

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Send her a complimentary makeover and hairdo from Pfaster Enterprises... does she have permed or color treated hair...?

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Run over her sorry ass with a Mercury Sable...any color...Lariat rental can get you one..

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Have her marry Spender. On their honeymoon, they'll go to Skyland mountain where they will first be stung by evil alien-virus-infested bee and then they will be torched by faceless aliens.
ScullyX1013

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Rent her a room at the Bates Motel!
Sarver

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Take her to Texas and claim that she had a small accident with some (Phantom) tanker trucks...
Julia

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Let her see M&S kiss... She'll have a coronary!

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A glass of wine laced with potassium is virtually untraceable as potassium is present at small levels in the body... then bury her in the "field where I..." --oh nevermind!

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Just suggest to Eve #6 that Diana's had a hankerin' to adopt a little girl... about 8 years old...

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Douse her in gasoline... I think you can guess what's next...
Julia

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...and send her in for some bee stings...?

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Diana is found just days after her release from the hospital with "Sister" carved on her chest...
xbelle4xs

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Let's have her sliced by an alien...
For all the gory details, have a look at this nice little story by Alysia Robertson

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Just have Scully blow her away.
xtremephile1

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Stab her in the base of the neck with a stiletto. We all know she's really an alien!

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Send her on a "nice trip to the forest." Any forest will do, really - they all seem equally deadly.

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Send her on a one-way trip to Tunguska.
Samantha

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Put *her* through what Scully's been through..an abduction, metal chip, kill her sister, take ou the chip, give her cancer, make her barren, give her an alien/human hybrid child, kill the child, give her a partner that ditches her, infect her with the black oil, bring her back...if she had to go through what Scully did, she'd never survive it!!!
Sarah

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Make her be Cancerman's love slave.
Ang

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Have her abducted and NOT returned!!!

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Bring Tooms back out from under the escalator and have him "eat her liver with some fava beans and a nice quiante"!
Flossie Starbuck

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Give her a couple drinks on a British Oceanliner and let her jump overboard, it is the Bermuda Triangle after all...
Jelly

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Drug her water then see what happens...
Laure

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Put a spell on her that makes her fall madly in love with Mulder. She will go insane and commit suicide because he will reject her.
The Wiz

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Use her to prove to the aliens that there really ISN'T any intelligent life on other planets!!

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Shoot her in the stomach- it's the most painful way to die!
Brenna

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Dress her up like Scully and lock her in a room with Frohike ("Hello, pretty lady...")
Suzanne

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Coat her in honey and send her into a giant Jiffy Popper.

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Put her in a posessed elevator (think "Ghost in the Machine")

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I suggest that the writers find a way to use her full potential, so that people wouldn't feel such a need to bash her.

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Well I suggest the writers...writerout!!! ha ha
ctshopgirl

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Render her permanently blind (Mulder where are you?) and walk her off a cliff, any cliff will do...
Julia Gulia

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Staples, lots and lots of staples!!

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Have someone stick that pointy sharp thing (the one they stuck in the back of the aliens/clones necks) in the back of her neck and see whether or not she's an alien, if she's not... Oh well!! No big loss!!
Caroline

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Send her to a small trailer park town in texas and order her a pizza...

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Let her accompany our nice lil alien into the nuclear power plant and see how a bit of radiation becomes her...
Fairy

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Send her to some Diana-eating-monster land!!!!
Invisigoth

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Send her on a mission to find a new world. One that's like a million trillion light years away where she has like no heart and cannot rekindle the flame with Mulder (who obviously belongs to Scully.) Then all will be right with the world......
Invisigoth

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It seems she might be an alien, so can we get one of those pointy object that Spender had last night in Disclosure and stab her in the back of the neck and what all that green stuff ooze out!
Josephine Purich

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I bet her nice lil head would look even nicer in a plastic bag...

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Cerulean is a gentle breeze...lock her in a cell with Pusher and we'll see what happens.

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How about some nice, quiet psychiatric hospital? Which one was that where Mulder was in Folie deux? Or is she old enough for "Excelsis Dei"?

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Spender beats Fowley to death after finding out she has had an affair.
Krissie FBI

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Make her listen to Britney Spears for more than 5 minutes.

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A suggestion to the writers: spontaneous combustion!
Sarah Christine

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Take Diana to the "Falls At Arcadia" and handcuff her to a bulldozer. Then summon the monster!
Scully

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Make a clone of herself to follow her around and when she finds out how aggravating she really is she'll commit suicide to spare everyone else (after stabbing the clone in the back of the head with the stiletto of course).
Morgy D

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Call Roush and ask when they would like to pick up their next volunteer test subject....
MIBDana

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Tell her someone found bile in her AC vents and she should crawl in there to check it out...(hopefully Tooms will be out of Prison)
StArBuCk

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No need for her to die... Involuntary amnesia will do fine! To hear how *poor* Diana loses her mind, read this story by TeaL

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All she needs is a nice, fat grease and cholesterol diet -- and a date with Virgil Incanto...
Fairy

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Have the gang from Sesame St. crush her with the featured letters of the day...F, O , and X.
Nisei

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Two red hot pokers to the eyes.
Mrs. David Duchovny

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Make her sit through a "Barney the dinosaur" marathon!

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Let me get rid of her....heh, heh, heh!
X

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Lock her in a room with EVIL JOAN RIVERS. That oughta do it.
Leader of the crusade against EVIL JOAN RIVERS

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Dip her in fancy feast sauce and cover cat nip head to toe. Now let those cats lose!
Elodie Jean

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Poisoned iced tea...and while she's dying, she has to watch Mulder profess his undying love for Scully...
Detour1013 (Em)

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Um, get that guy from Humbug to eat her, along with that drunk guys twin that was attached to the drunk guys side.
Sharris

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Have her run into the peacocks and become their new love toy and die giving birth to a disfigured mutant.
Robin

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Have Mulder do a live atopsy on her so she dies the most terrible Death.
Scully

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Cut off her head and eat her like in OUR TOWN.
Scully

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Have a south american psychic surgeon/manifestation of an author's imagination RIP HER HEART OUT!!
shipperchick

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Diana comes home to a strange noise in her bedroom. She opens the door to find Mulder and Scully doing it in her bed. Mulder sees her and hands Scully a gun. She shoots Diana between the eyes in a fit of INTENSE passion. End of the Fowl one.
DFantum

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Lock her in a room with Bambi, Phoebe, and Kristen. They'd all be so jealous of each other... can you say "cat fight"?? Or there's the ever-so-popular sport of ripping her still-beating heart out of her chest!
Starbuck

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Introduce her to Gerald Schnauz -- "You look troubled..."
Kate

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Two words.....Anal Probe. A BIIIIGG one..... We'll finally know what she's had up 'er ass all this time.
LARA CROFT

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Mulder and Scully kill her by shooting her with lots and lots of bullets or they run her over with a train!
UK

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Introduce her to Krycek.....Hey, look what happened to Marita...and she kissed the Ratboy!
DFantum

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Guillotine. Only the blade is REAL dull, so it has to be dropped over and over and over and over and...well, you get the picture.
President of SATHDOD (Society Against The Humane Death Of Diana)

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Hook her up to a modem and send her on a tour of the top 100 anti-diana sites, and then show her evey shipper site in eXistence - she'll never survive that, the little toad.
Red

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Just resurrect Chuckie and tell him to kill her, chop her up reeeeal nice.
pezzi

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Poetic justice: Bumpy road. High speed chase. Inadequate brassiere. "So, Agent Mulder, your companion was battered in the face by your perpetrator?"

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Have her become an intern at the whitehouse... see how Monica feels!
premohunny

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Leave her with CSM, his son was dissposable, what about her?
z

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