Wet and Messy

What fun to see stocks and pillories being put to their original purpose: punishment through public humiliation. And the time-honoured tradition of pelting the criminal with all sorts of yucky things is still going strong. Fairs and fetes often have stocks and pillories in which people willingly subject themselves to a barrage of soggy sponges, custard pies and the like. There never seems to be a shortage of volunteers, and there are always plenty of people who are eager to pelt the helpless prisoner........as the following pictures demonstrate ;-)

Click on the pictures to see a larger version.

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A great series of pics. Good to see tomatoes making a comeback, after all the wet sponges and custard pies. The old ways are the best (nostalgic sigh).

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The demon drink shalt lead ye to eternal damnation....or a spell in the pillory at the Bristol renfaire.

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Now for some "before and after" pictures. Wonderful expressions on their faces!

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These vidcaps are from the Richard Bey Show, a US television programme. Here we see a worthy attempt to reinstate the pillory as a community punishment. The entire audience is invited to pie the miscreant in the pillory....which they do with undisguised glee!

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More vidcaps from the Richard Bey Show. Baked beans this time. Less fattening than pies, although the truly health conscious would opt for rotten tomatoes. Less than 50 calories per splat.

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Here are some vidcaps from an Australian TV programme called "Genie Down Under". A demonstration of close up tomato work.


“I suppose you think this is funny?”


“Maybe this will fix my split ends?”


“I've never been so humiliated in my life”


“Uh oh......I spoke too soon”




“I hate tomatoes!”

Here is the wonderful Rosaleen Young in the stocks....getting very messy indeed. I don't know what Rosaleen did to get put in the stocks, but she must have been very naughty :-)

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These are from a British TV show called Wakey Wakey Campers, where volunteers stay in a nostalgic 1960s style holiday camp. The camp has strict rules, as Joanna finds out to her cost.

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Another British TV show called Cruel Winter, which shows how far modern holiday camps have progressed since the 1960s. Here the guests are treated to a facial in the camp's luxury health spa. In first class, there is a choice of tomatoes, mud or gravy.

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The good people of Mons en Pevele demonstrate their time-honoured method of testing suspected witches. First catch a witch and place her in a medium-sized pillory.


Then apply a large flagon of holy water. The water should be chilled for best results.


The witch should then be annointed with consecrated mud. If a priest is not available, ordinary garden mud will do.


It has been scientifically proven that witches have an aversion to boiled sweets. As you can see, orange flavour is particularly effective.


When confronted with clingfilm, the witch will usually confess that she is a handmaiden of Beelzebub. It is essential that this final test is performed by a man wearing a kilt.

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Designed December 1997 by shrew@saintly.com, with the kind assistance of my friend Eija-Riitta.

Last modified 10 November 2008.