In 1996 I was 16 years old, I loved to party and thought I was invincible. That all changed in December of that year, my sister died in a car accident and my life was shattered. The stress of her dying led me to drinking more than I did before, the emotional stress made my period stop, I didn't care though, I didn't go to the Dr.. for it at all. About 6 months after my sister died I was still partying and having a good time but I got pregnant with my boyfriends baby around the end of May. I didn't know that I was pregnant at all though, I didn't gain weight, have morning sickness, nothing. In about August I started having muscle spasms in my back, so bad I couldn't breath so I went to the Dr.. for that. He sent me for physio therapy, put my on muscle relaxers and after a month and a half of that not working he sent me for an x-ray.
The day of the x-ray I went into the office, convinced that I had pulled some kind of muscle that summer in Florida on one of the rides at Disneyland. I got the x-rays done and the nurse told me to wait in the room while she looked at them. I was reading a magazine when she came storming in, "Marcia when was your last period?" I was stunned, I sat there and said "I don't know, January" and then she told me I was pregnant. I was so scared. She told me that just because I had had an x-ray didn't mean that I was going to have an abortion, but my mind was whirling. I was so scared to tell my boyfriend, my parents, and what was I going to do about school? I didn't want to go to school pregnant.
I went for Dr's appointments and had an ultrasound done to find out how far
along I was and if the baby was ok. I told my boyfriend right away and he said he'd stick by me no matter what. He said that he wanted to give our baby up for adoption though but ultimately it was my choice. When I went for my first ultrasound my boyfriend and I snuck out of school and drove to the hospital to have it done. He didn't come into the room with me, I think he was scared more than anything. I was in that room all alone with the ultrasound technician who was more than a little rude to me. I was so scared and I felt so lonely. But when I saw my baby in that screen I knew that I didn't want to give my baby up. I knew that I'd love my baby no matter what. I even thought that I knew it was a girl.
The next week I went for more Dr's appointments by sneaking out of school. I was seeing a therapist for depression still from my sister's death so I told him about it. He helped prepare me for telling my parents about my baby. I was already 24 weeks along and I had only gained about 10 pounds so no one could tell yet.
I told my mom first, I thought for sure she would freak and start crying but she was so happy right from the start. She says now that my baby is like a god send, helping us get through my sister dying. My dad took the news pretty good too. They both said that they would support me no matter what.
The last months of me being pregnant flew by, my mom and I going shopping and getting everything ready for my new baby, my boyfriend in school and working. (I dropped out for health reasons, my blood pressure was sky high) He moved in to my parents house a month before I had our baby. We thought that it would be easiest that way, we paid room and board and bought our own grocery's just like we had our own place. We wanted to do this as much on our own as we could.
My doctor was convinced I was having a boy because of the heart beat. I didn't know though, I felt that I was having a girl so we didn't decorate the nursery at all in fear of using the wrong colors.
I ended up in the hospital a month before I was due because my blood pressure was so high the Dr.. wanted to make sure I was on complete bed rest. I got out 3 days later but had to be in bed all the time at home.
In March of 1998 I was 2 weeks overdue when the Dr.. decided that he wanted to induce me. So I went into the hospital with my boyfriend and my mother, who was almost bouncing off walls with anticipation. My labor didn't start until 12 hours after me being on intervenus and an epidural in my back (they started preparing me for c-section because my body wasn't going into labor at all) but all of a sudden within half an hour after the epidural being put in I was in full labor and almost fully dilated. So we waited until 10:30 pm, (I remember the time because the Dr.. said I had to wait until 10:30 to go into the delivery room and by that time I could feel my baby's head pushing down so I was really ready to go)
At 10:50 pm my daughter Sonya Cailee was born weighing 7 pounds exactly and screaming her little head off. It was the happiest and scariest time of my life. My boyfriend was the first to hold her, he looked so proud. I will never forget the look on his face. My mom was snapping pictures like crazy and my boyfriends mom was waiting in the recovery room to see her first grand-daughter.
I didn't have many friends come into the hospital at all after Sonya was
born, my mom came in and stayed all day, my boyfriends mom and grandma came in for a couple hours and my boyfriend came in after work the next day. I was lonely because a lot of my friends left me when they found out I was pregnant. I couldn't party anymore and we didn't have anything in common anymore. It was a very lonely time and very sobering, I really learned who my friends were.
Sonya is now almost 2 years old. The last two years have been very trying for both me and her daddy. I graduated from high school with an 80% average and he got a better job that supports us very well. Sonya is a very healthy, happy baby who loves to talk and color. She is above average for everything she does, I worried that the x-ray I had would affect her development but we had her tested for development and she was doing things that three year olds do when she was 18 months old. She is very well loved and the greatest thing that ever happened to me and my family. I sometimes miss all the things that I can't do now like be young and carefree, so many young girls and boys don't see what they have. But I love Sonya so much, she is the one thing in my life that when all else is bad all I have to do is look at her and I feel better.
My boyfriend and I got engaged this past July but don't plan on getting married for another two years. We are young enough to wait and we want to be ready for the next big step in our lives. If there is a young girl out there reading this message and you are thinking of having a baby, please do yourself a favor, because even though you might have the love that a child brings, live your life, be young and stupid (but not to stupid) and wait until you are older to have a baby. I love Sonya to death, I would never trade her for anything, but if you have a choice, wait and enjoy your teen years the best you can!!