So far, this is the best INFP profile I've found on the web, and so below, I compare myself with this profile.

*I'd really like to hear personal INFP accounts from readers. I'm curious to know what kinds of triumphs and obstacles you've faced or are still facing, what kind of career paths you've chosen, what your significant others are like, and whether you're an impractical, sometimes irrational, procrastinating, loner-type like me. Please drop me a note!

Books to read (still):

• one by Alexander Avila on type & dating
• *Just Your Type* by Paul Tieger and Barbara Barron-Tieger, which analyzes all the types and their interactions.

Introverted:

Although I'm introverted, I very much enjoy meeting people. I am so curious about people's life experiences and interests to the point of being considered nosey. My fascination with people means that I also enjoy traveling, watching documentaries about people's lives, reading online journals, visiting people's homes (and exploring their bookshelves, knick knacks, photos, etc.), meeting people's friends and families, etc.

When I'm around people who I feel comfortable with, I can talk animatedly. I ask lots of questions at risk of seeming to pry. But I just hate superficial small talk. The reason I ask oftentimes personal questions is that I truly am interested in the answers -not to put people on the defensive.

And over the years, I've managed to develop enough self-confidence to speak up when I feel strongly about something or to ask questions which I know to be valid.

However, I'm also very shy. I refuse to go into artificial places like bars where the main purpose is to hook up with complete strangers. That seems too contrived an exercise for me, and wouldn't want to do it even if I knew how. I also am uncomfortable going to large social gatherings where the only person that I might know would be too busy to hang out much with me. 

In many cases, people who don't know me well may suspect that my quietness means that I'm not having a good time. Or they might label me the "strong silent-type". But I actually might be enjoying the experience. I'm just not very talkative to people I don't think I have much in common with or who I'm uncomfortable with - but it doesn't mean that I necessarily dislike them. I just might be thinking that I don't have very much to contribute to their conversation. However, it also might be that I think you don't like me so I'm not going to bother opening up to you. And when I'm around naturally talkative, opinionated types who control the conversations, I have difficulty jumping in because by the time I've thought up clearly what to say, they've already moved onto the next topic. This was my experience particularly in high school philosophy class. I thought that maybe I was slower than others mentally, but maybe I just have a different personality type.

Obviously, as an introverted person, I'm very much obsessed with learning more about myself. That's why I'm writing this down. 

I do enjoy going out occasionally, but I'm a homebody at heart. I like spending time with my family, watching TV, working on the computer, reading, or doing some other quiet activity. I try to avoid days where I am so busy running amok around town that I have no time to just take a breather for myself and read the newspaper daily. I refuse to live that kind of a life. I make spending time with myself a priority each day. It rejuvenates me and grounds me.

As an introvert, I enjoy my personal space. I've been fortunate to have my own bedroom and a study room for the majority of my life - where other people are not welcome to enter as they please.

iNtuitive:

I tend to think of many things at once. Unfortunately, this often occurs when I'm even having conversations with other people. I seem to change subjects often, which some may think quite rude and flighty. But really, I'm not deliberately changing subjects just because I get bored easily. The enfolding conversation and stimulus from my environment just trigger new ideas in my head constantly and I'm concerned that if I don't mention those new thoughts immediately, I might forget them.  

While I do daydream and fantasize of a life vastly different from my currently mundane one, I'm unlike other INFPs in that I've never been very much into supernatural or science fiction fantasies. The only science fiction I've enjoyed watching is The Twilight Zone. I'm more interested in realistic story lines. I never treated my dolls as real people when I was a kid. I've never had an imaginary friend, although to this day, I have a tendency to talk to myself ^_^. I've never played Dungeons & Dragons or any other fantasy role-playing games. I don't watch Star Trek or the X-Files and anything supernormal. I have no interest in attending Renaissance Faires. However, I enjoy reading (fictional and non-fictional) about different kinds of people in interesting circumstances - people that I would like to meet and situations that I would like to experience. I also daydream about what life would've been like if I had taken different turns in life, or if I was born into different circumstances. As for the future, I hold on to my dream of an exciting, creative life - full of travel, adventures, and meeting new people. And of course, of finding real love.

I enjoy learning for learning's sake. I'd like to believe that I should study and do what I like, and the money will follow.

And yes, I do enjoy word games, cross word puzzles, and puns.

I definitely want to understand how things fit into the big picture. If I don't understand the ultimate purpose of something, I'm not really sure I want to do it.

I often don't take things too literally because I can sense things beneath the surface that might differ from what people say out loud. I'm fairly sensitive in that respect. I guess I have 'thin-skin', because I can easily get offended, and take things personally.

Feeling:

I definitely make decisions mainly from my gut rather than from my head, especially when messages diverge. Often times, that has caused me trouble because my head (and other people) tends to be more rational.

I consider myself to be rather selfish and self-centered. I don't think I make decisions based on how others feel, but on how I feel first - at least for important decisions affecting me. At this point in my life when I am single and have no dependents, I don't feel I need to put other's needs above my own. That's not something I look forward to doing in the future either.

I find people in general fascinating, and feel my purpose in life is to somehow help others and make the world a better place. At the same time, I'm fairly aloof, lacking the adept social skills of many of my peers. I care so immensely about people that as a protective mechanism, I've been hesitant about getting too close to them for fear that their pain becomes my pain to the point that it becomes unbearable for me. I don't like hearing other people's troubles especially when I can't help them. I also don't want to care so much about people that they can hurt me or disappoint me. Hence, I care for people as a whole and want to improve the welfare of others but I don't want to care about individuals too deeply.

I can't really say that I avoid conflict at all costs. I'm not always friendly; I can be snobbish and shy. I'm also not always tactful, not possessing strong people skills and all. In fact, I have a tendency to just say whatever is on my mind - whatever it is that I feel. For example, while visiting a friend in New York City, I exclaimed to her local friends how they had accents. It wasn't intended to be mean. When I later found out that they didn't appreciate the comment and said that *I* had an accent, I felt kind of bad. Admittedly though, I'm passive-aggressive. Rather than confronting a person face-to-face, I would more likely just write them a nasty email instead. However, even then, I wouldn't do it unless my values and ideas of how things ought to be were violated in the first place. Anyway, I would never be deliberately mean to anyone - especially vulnerable types- for no apparent reason other than that they don't have anyone around to stick up for them. 

I definitely find people more intriguing than inanimate objects. That's why I was amazed when an engineer friend told me that he actually never notices nor is as curious about many things about people, but he can go on and on about things like trains, buses (diesel, trolley), ships, planes, etc. 

Perceptive:

I am a very indecisive person, especially about what to do with my life. Instead of knowing that my life is planned out, I'd like to think that there will be many exciting adventures down the road. I certainly enjoy road trips in which I would have the time to stop or make a detour if something more exciting came along the way. The journey matters as much as the destination. I truly would like to go on a road trip driving across the United States.

I definitely wish to pursue work that is interesting and has meaning, something that I can be passionate about. Otherwise, it would just be a job and I would lose interest too quickly. I absolutely detest too much routine, mechanization, and petty detail because I want to contribute to society using my intelligence and creativity. The last thing I want to become is like a robot. 

I am terrible at meeting deadlines. They used to pump up my adrenaline and I enjoyed that. Now, however, deadlines are too much pressure to handle.

As I mentioned before, I tend to jump from subject to subject, depending on whatever comes to my mind. I'm not consciously trying to be rude.

Overall, I'm not at all religious but I have strong, uncompromising values. I don't like to jump on the bandwagon unless I fully understand what the issue is all about. When something I feel strongly about is infringed upon, I will be very vocal about it. However, I don't enjoy the spotlight. If there are other people around to take up my cause, I would be more than happy to return to the shadows and conserve my energy.

I am withdrawn to people who I don't really have much in common with. When I feel very comfortable with people who I sense a connection with personality-wise, I can be somewhat witty and warped. I would rather I had deep, true friendships with a few people rather than superficial friendships with many people. I long for genuine friendships in which people understand and care about me and vice versa. If people just don't "get" me, I don't really have much interest in wasting my time pursuing friendships with them.

Unfortunately, I have trouble sharing my deepest problems and insecurities with friends, thereby isolating myself from them and preventing the friendships from becoming deeper. I keep a protective wall around myself.

It has been said that INFP's are good listeners. Well, I'm neither a good talker nor a good listener. I can be talkative when I feel comfortable around you, but still, only when I have things to say. People who can always come up with things to say and like to talk nonstop tire me out. I don't dislike them, but listening to them can sap my energy. And when people like to drone on about boring stuff when I would rather they just answered me with only a one-sentence reply, I get impatient (though I try not to be rude about it. These people just aren't in tune with others and think whatever they find interesting must be interesting to everyone else too...Uh oh, I can be guilty of that too!). On the other hand, I have a pretty good memory about people. If you told me ten years ago that someone we both knew phoned you about something, or that you and your relatives like to spend winter holidays in some cabin in Quebec, I would still remember even when you've forgotten, and even if we were mere acquaintances. But if you told me boring details like what songs you like or explained to me the intricacies of the inside of a car, I wouldn't really have listened intently to begin with, much less remember it.  

I'd like to think of myself as creative. I love the visual arts. However, I've preoccupied my life with finding a career for so many years now that I've neglected making art. And I'm not very good with the written word. I enjoy writing but I'm not a talented writer. I'm not good with understanding poetry either, much less writing poetry. Plus, I barely listen to music. 

I've already mentioned how I need work that is meaningful and fits into the bigger picture. The work must be aligned with my personal values. I enjoy working with others, but they must be people I like. If I don't like them, I don't want to waste my life working with them. It's pretty easy to get me to like you as a co-worker though. Just treat me as a friend, someone who you genuinely would like to get to know better. Don't talk behind my back, don't backstab me, don't treat me as someone intellectually inferior to you. I have feelings and I deserve respect.

As I said before, I need time and space to reflect and recharge. I'm not very organized with my time nor with my space, although I understand the necessity to be so.

I like leading occasionally, e.g. going on a leisurely hike, or teaching a group of interested people something, or organizing for a cause I believe in. In such situations, I feel like I'm thinking instead of being a drone, that I'm making a difference in other people's lives, or that I get to have some control over a project. However, I don't consider myself to be a strong charismatic leader whatsoever. In most cases, I prefer to be the second-in-command. That way, I get to have the ear of the person in charge without having to endure the stress of being responsible for everything and being the potential fall guy. I'd rather save my energy; I don't like stress.

I have many problems with perfectionism and procrastination. As a result, I've accomplished less than others my age. I think I peaked at age 14. I have trouble finishing many things that I started. Additionally, I would anticipate some things or activities to be exactly as I imagine (e.g. eating food at a new restaurant, visiting a new place) so inevitably I would end up being disappointed when they turn out differently. I can come off to others as being overly critical and therefore unpleasant to hang out with at times. Little do people know that what I'm most critical of is actually myself.

Yes, I'm still young and idealistic. I've pursued various intellectual and practical career paths in school, but I feel that my creativity is being suffocated. With my head stuck in the clouds, my family members don't really understand me and I don't really understand them. As I struggle in life, I feel like a duckling in an extended family of swans.

Home  |  My Online Journal | Q&A  |  Some Links  | Contact Me