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Mr. Jackass

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It is finally time for me to write again. I mean really write. Today a journalist sits back and scribbles bullshit about the society they live in. They spew off meaningless attributes about shit they can't, or won't change.

I can't change it either.

I wish I could change how things are run, but that's not my field. I'm just a no-name cartoonist/ranting idiot with some internet access and a half-assed audience to complain to.

But I do know one thing for sure.

Our president is a jackass.

I'm still not sure if it's funny or not. Some, or most, jackasses rather, are humorous in nature. They're so stupid or pathetic that you can't help but laugh and say to yourself, "They're so stupid it's funny."

But the "Toad" that is our president walks a fine line between a funny jackass, and an irritating fuck-up.

This bothers me. I hate not knowing what to think of people. Generally I can look at a person and instantly know who they are and what they stand for. Most are full of shit, others have a bit of decency left in them.

But the Toad, he is a puzzle. He is a man who I cannot help but hate, due to the fact that he obviously does not deserve the job, or most importantly, the responsibility of being president. But at the same time, I am drawn to this individual. For I cannot help but look at this man and laugh.

For he is truly, a dumb looking mother fucker.

Seriously, let's dissect this man who we, the "Jerry" chanting crowds of Americans, have elected to rule our lives. He is the epitome of what America hates, yet he is our leader.

He bears a constantly un-kept look, his hair shabby and his clothes thrown on like a retarded third grader attempting to dress himself for the first time. His eyes are always hollow, beady, and evil in nature. You cannot tell what this man is truly thinking. But worse than all, he is always smirking. Not enough for the average joe-blow with a pitchfork up his ass to notice, but enough for those of you with half a working braincell that isn't being controlled by your reproductive organ, to see. It is a devilish little smirk that cracks the souls of every human that it touches and scares little furry bunnies back into their homes with "For Sale" signs suddenly posted out front.

This man, this Toad, is America's biggest nightmare, and we asked for it.

We deserve it.

Because this is what we are, this is what we've become. Braindead shitholes who don't choose to elect idiots, but instead force ourselves to.

I have no real reason for writing this. No journalist ever does. And I'm not even a journalist, so I have even more freedom.


But tonight, or today, or this morning, or whatever, if you think about one thing, think about who's leading your country. A Toad with a smirk that says "Fuck you."

And remember, you asked for it. And so did I.

Just a thought to brighten your day.


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EVERYTHING relating to EoB (the Epitome of Boredom) Copyright & TM 1999 Rhett Dornack. No part of it may be reproduced by any means without the written consent of Rhett Dornack, except for the purpose of review. Any similarities to persons living, dead or whatever, is purely coincidence or for satire. And remember, I hate everyone, not just you!
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