tTHE SAD SWEET SLEEP OF THANATOPSIS JONES

A screenplay by Raleigh Marcell contemporary COMEDY CONTACT AUTHOR CONTACT AUTHOR'S AGENT Mary Ann Amato

When a teenaged girl (Thanatopsis Jones)on life-support is unplugged by her parents and pronounced dead her sister, who knows her to be alive, kidnaps the body to prevent its cremation setting off a bizarre journey through the netherworld of The Greater Duluth Memorial Hospital for the Incredibly Ill. Thanatopsis finally finds peace and escape as a stowaway on a satellite headed to Pluto.

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MY FAVORITE SCENE WHEN THE MOTHER OF THE GIRL ON LIFE-SUPPORT IS CONFRONTED BY A PAIR OF AGEING HIPIES CUM SECULAR HUMANISTS WEARING "SAVE THE WHALES" T-SHIRTS IN ORDER TO CONVINCE HER TO PULL THE PLUG, THEY LAY THEIR CAUCASOID RAP ON HER: "Secular Humanist is what we are. We're white And so bright And tintinnabular--- (patronizingly:) Like the ringing of bells.... We tend to be shrilly But never are silly We're just Regular Secular Humanists! All life is sacred We cry for misfits Who've carved up their parents And chopped them to bits. 'Have mercy!' she quivers 'Don't kill him!' he sniffs--- We're just Regular Secular Humanists! Don't talk to us of fetuses We'd rather save the cetuses Or baby seals or minnows in a stream And if you bring up morals We'll be running out of portals 'Cause no one's fully human till They're six or seven-teen! We have never eaten food that's fried Contrary thoughts we can't abide WE'RE COMPLETELY L.L. BEANIFIED! We're just Regular Secular Humanistsssssssssssssssssssss---!

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