Sometimes I think that whatever I have understood so far may be wrong.
But I do not repent because my conscience is very clear. I have never
said or done anything for any selfish motive. I never throw dust in
your eyes to get name or fame for this short life. This is also a
fact - that I need money for Manavta Mandir - but I never wish to adopt
fraudulent methods for the collection of money. If anybody wishes to
help the Mandir happily, he may, but if one does not want then one may
not. I care not for the position of a preceptor. I have fear and my
life trembles at the thought of the harvest of bad deeds, for we all
must reap the harvest of our deeds. If you live upon the hard
earnings of others, you deceive others and you indulge in acts of
fraud for your selfish motives. Then where would you go? Who would
save you when great Saints themselves could not remain safe? O! my
Preceptor, I do not know whether I am right or wrong. I challenge all
the Saints and gurus of the present to denounce me if I am wrong. I
shall not mind. I only tell what has happened or is happening with
When I went to Dinod I sincerely thought - did I go to reap the crops of Tara Chand? No, not at all. I did not know anything about it until Tara Chand Ji told me. Now Tara Chand says that if Baba Ji had not come his way he would have become an egotist. Whatever form manifests to you it is the form of your own faith and belief. But we are divided into different religions and sects on the basis of these very manifestations. O! householders I have come for you. Do not be misled by any false promises. Try to understand the Truth and purify your deeds. Open you eyes, Jagan Nath, I did not go to awaken you at 1:30 a.m., day before yesterday. I did not even know about you earlier. You have donated four hundred rupees. I do need money for the Mandir. I express my thanks to you, but I speak the Truth. You may accept it or not. I have done my duty towards you. If what I have experienced in life has been the experience of other gurus and Saints, then I would say these gurus, whosoever they be, did not do anything good to us. They befooled us, exploited us and looted us for their own name, fame and for establishing their religious estates.
How does one attain peace? How did I gain peace? I can tell about that alone. When Krishak Ji came he handed me his diary in which he had written in detail about how my form guided him in his inner search from time to time. I put one coconut and five paisa at his feet and bowed to him. I permitted him to initiate the aspirants saying, "You would yourself realize the Truth." He stayed in the Mandir for about ten months. I paid eighty rupees for his expenses and sixty rupees to his attendant, because he helped me to attain peace. I did not initiate Dayal Dass nor did I impart Nam to Kamalpur Wali Mata. It was their faith and belief that helped them. They accepted my word as Nam and me as their Guru. But I gained the more. My entire struggle and search for the Guru came to an end. I recognized my mind and attained Peace. Now my practice starts beyond the regions of mind i.e., from the Light. The philosophy of Radhasoami faith also directs that the aspirant should go beyond mental regions to Satya-Lok. Only then liberation would be achieved.
He who gives them [love, affection, and belief] to others gains himself. So, it is the belief of the people that benefits them. I do not do anything. Their faith and belief in me brings their cherished fruit to them. It is not "I" who manifests myself to them.
To give love and affection to others means to have faith in them, to believe them. I too have benefited from this. I daily receive a number of letters in which people write, "Baba Ji, by contemplating upon your holy form, we achieved this thing and our difficult problems were solved." I do nothing. It is their own love and affection that fructifies. Therefore I say that whomsoever you believe have firm faith that He is Perfect, Sublime, and Omnipotent; all your problems shall be solved and all your works would be done. He who does not attend my discourses or listens to me in person, but contemplates upon forms, he worships the dead Guru. You do not understand the true meaning of Guru's worship. You consider that offering of money to the Guru and bowing at his feet is Guru worship. These are worldly customs and norms of our civilization. Those who simply contemplate upon the form of the Guru, they worship their own mind, because inner visions are the creations of your own mind, and nothing comes from without. This is what I have understood.
I know that I am speaking of things of a very high level, but I am helpless. Old men do not talk like small children. I am obliged to speak about that condition alone in which I dwell. People come to me, I speak to them with a very clean heart and sincere conscience. It is possible that I may be wrong. I have known the miserable end of the gurus and the Saints. I feel afraid. I do not know how I shall die, but if I also meet a miserable end and I remain conscious at the time of parting from this body then I shall also proclaim like Alexander the Great who said, "Keep my empty hands out of my coffin." I shall say that none should speak the Truth in this world, none should be sincere and none should live an honest life, but live as per one's desires!
I wonder when I study the lives of these Saints and mahatmas and doubt whether these mahatmas did any justice to their ignorant disciples. They did not disclose the total Truth as they knew it, possibly due to the paucity of true seekers or due to their selfish motives of name, fame and wealth. But if a disciple does not feel indebted to the Guru who imparts him True Knowledge then that disciple is most ungrateful.
I proclaim that I do nothing. Not just I, no one can do anything. Had anybody been able to do anything then these Saints must have, first of all, set their own children and wives on the right Path. Had Data Dayal Ji got any miraculous power he would not have allowed the disintegration of his own Dham (centre). I had predicted in 1919 to Hazur Data Dayal Ji that his centre would totter in ruins. Why did I say so? Because I had an insight. . . .
You come to me [and] I feel my responsibility and thus I speak the Truth to you without any reservation. I do not do any favour to you. Whatever I do, it is in obedience to the commands of Hazur Data Dayal Ji and Hazur Sawan Singh Ji Maharaj. Hazur Baba Sawan Singh Ji had said to me, "Faqir, carry on your work without any fear. I shall stand by you." Thus [I] speak the Truth without any fear, that everybody is bound to reap the fruit of his or her deeds. Do not live in this hope that you, a follower of Radhasoami, are initiated by a great Guru or that you are a devotee of Lord Krishna or Rama and thus you shall go free. Nay. Whatever deeds you do, fruit of those, must be reaped by you.
You must have read or listened to the story of Mahabharata. Arjuna achieved an impossible victory with the blessings of Lord Krishna. His power was unsurpassed and his arrows were irresistible. When the whole tribe of Lord Krishna died in civil war after Lord Krishna's death, Arjuna accompanied the remaining women and gopis to a safer place, but on the way the Bhils snatched away all the beloved wives of Lord Krishna from Arjuna. The unsurpassing strength and irresistible arrows of Arjuna could not protect those ladies of Lord Krishna's clan. This is the philosophy of karma. Who is safe and free from it? Whatever happens to us is all due to our own deeds. So why make a hue and cry when there is any distress for you? Why do you run hither and thither, weeping and pleading? Therefore I say time and again, "O! man you reform your ways and be clear in your conscience."
Perform your duty with compassion, remain detached from the world,
recognize every creature like thyself, and attain the imperishable.
Unless you attain to such a practical living, you can never get
released from the cycle of transmigration, even though you might be
initiated by a great Guru.