Why is Canada a country?

Canada is our good old neighbor to the north.  Canada is a peaciful country, but exactly why is Canada there?
Canadian people are a bit different than us.  They don't speak English, they speak the Queen's English, when they don't even have a Queen, they have a prime minister.  Canadian people also believe they are French.  Why do they think they are French.  They don't live in France, so they are not French.  Quebek is the biggest offender.  People in Quebek want to break off and form their own country. That's stupid for two reasons.  One, they will be surrounded by the rest of Canada, and two, they can't just sail back to France.  What people don't know is that the people in Quebek are really aliens.  Would a normal person try to form his or her own country?  No, only aliens would.  The aliens don't know that they can't sail back to France.  They have no idea of direction on earth.
Canadian people live around us.  Michael J Fox, Alex Trabek, Mike Meyers are all Canadian.  They dominate our television, game show, movie industries.  The popular TV show ,X-Files is filmed in Canada.  Of course it's not filmed where it says it is.  It is really filmed in Quebek, not Vancouver.  It wants you to believe it is filmed in Vancouver.  Quebek is the perfect coverup.  Why not film a show about aliens in a province that is full of aliens.  No wonder the show is so popular.
Lastly, what do Canadians do.  They try to join American sports, but have their own football league.  They have bad beer with wierd names.  Molson, LaBatts, Pabst?  They call everybody "hosier" and end every sentence with "ay".  The Tribe of Lothar believes that Canada is trying to take over the world, aliens and all.  Please dont let them do that.


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