From the Diary of a Child
A child's perspective on forced grandparent visitation
June 12 - Mommy told me today that I have to go to Grandma Bea's and Grandpa James' house for a weekend visit. I cried and cried. I hate them. They are so mean to me. They say bad things about Mommy and Daddy all the time. I've tried to ask them to stop, but they just called me a cry baby. They said if I told, they would tell everyone what a little liar I am. I begged Mommy not to make me go back there. Mommy started crying and said there was nothing she could do.
June 13 - I heard Mommy and Daddy fighting last night. The only time they ever fight is when they are talking about Grandma Bea and Grandpa James. I couldn't sleep so I sat on the stairs listening to them. They don't want me to go to Grandma and Grandpa's house either. They are worried about Grandpa's drinking. Daddy was telling Mommy how Grandpa used to drink and then would hit him. Mommy started crying and saying she felt helpless and that there should be something they could do to protect me. That's when Daddy started yelling "What do you want me TO do?!" He said that if they didn't send me to Grandma and Grandpa's then they could get put in jail. I heard Mommy say that even if the visitation was court-ordered, that still didn't make it right. It scares me to see Mommy and Daddy fight. It's all Grandma and Grandpa's fault. They don't care anything about us, so why can't they just leave us alone?
June 21 - Tomorrow is the day I have to go to Grandma Bea's and Grandpa James' house. I am so scared. I was thinking about it a lot at school today and I got in trouble for not listening. Maybe if I just ran away so Grandma and Grandpa couldn't find me then it would be better. I would miss Mommy and Daddy though, so I won't. After I got home from school, Grandma Bea called to tell me she would pick me up at 6 tomorrow night. That was all she said to me. She never asks me how I'm doing and she never says she loves me. I know she doesn't care about me at all. I'm just a way for them to be mean to Mommy and Daddy. Grandma talked to Mommy too. I think she said something mean to Mommy because Mommy started crying after she hung up. She tried not to let me see, but I did.
June 24 - I just got back from my weekend visit. It was horrible. When they got to our house, they pulled up and just honked. I was having trouble with my shoe laces so it took me a minute. They just sat outside and honked and honked. All the neighbors came out to see what was going on. It was so embarrassing. Grandma and Grandpa didn't talk to me much the whole weekend. When Grandma did talk to me, it was to say bad things about my mom. She kept saying how Mommy doesn't really love Daddy. That if she did love him, she would let him see them. Grandma Bea said Mommy had brainwashed Daddy against them. Grandma Bea said she would be a better mother to me than my Mommy. This really scared me. I was so afraid Grandma wasn't going to let me go home. I tried really hard not to cry, because Grandpa gets really mean when I cry and calls me a baby.
Grandpa didn't say much the whole weekend. He drank a lot and then called Mommy and Daddy bad names whenever Grandma Bea was talking about them. I really wanted to go home but I was too afraid to ask. I tried to be quiet so they wouldn't notice me.
On Sunday, one of my cousins came over for a while. We played outside all morning and were having fun. While we were playing tag, he pushed me into a big mud puddle that was in the backyard. Grandma Bea got really mad at me, not him. She called me lots of bad names and said I jumped in the puddle on purpose to get her in trouble with Daddy. But I saw her watching just before Jason pushed me, so I think she saw it. She made me strip down to my undies and wouldn't give me any other clothes to wear while she washed the muddy ones. Later, she made me promise not to tell Mommy and Daddy. I guess I won't because it will just make Mommy cry.
Tonight, when I say my prayers, I'm going to ask God to make this all go away. But I wonder, if Mommy and Daddy can't make it go away, can God?
This is a work of fiction written by Alisa Buck. Any resemblence to anyone or any circumstances, is completely coincidental.