It is time for an update to this page. As I sit here with tears on my cheeks, I am remembering all the encouraging, poignant and heartbreaking emails I have received from many women since I created this page and I hope my reunion has helped some of you. My story is still a successful one; my birthdaughter and I are still friends; I miss her terribly but I no longer panic if I don't "talk" to her weekly. We have both had life altering experiences as one does when they are part of a family; children are born and grandparents pass on. In spite of that, I feel she and I still have a special bond. Her mom told her that and I believe it to be true. I would hope someday to be able to go and see her again, perhaps meet her sons but if I never do, my heart is calm. I got what I wanted-she has a great home and family and my one and only birthchild is happy and loved. As her 40th birthday approaches in a few weeks, I will be thinking of nothing but what a great person she is and how I love her and the woman who made her that way, her mom.
The Original Story...
is a pictorial story of my first visit with a daughter I had given up for
adoption in 1963. A young woman who had always remained an infant
in my mind and heart. A young woman I never expected to see face to face
but through God's good graces and International Soundex Reunion Registry,
I got a call on May 5, 1997 that has changed my life forever. We spoke
for the first time at 7pm on that day and now I feel like I have known
her all my life. We have similarities and personalities that have to be
genetic and it is amazing to discover that fact after all the time and
very first time face to face and she stops to take my picture
as I open the door! (I could have at least made that bed!)
she arrives the second day, I decide to surprise her by taking HER picture!
She brought an armload of picture albums and we spent hours looking through
them. I felt like I was meeting everyone around her through those pictures.
Her mom and dad, brother, grandparents and in laws. I just couldn't quit
looking at her---my chin, his eyes, my freckles. We spent part of this
day going to the movies like old friends. We also went shopping one afternoon
while I was there. Imagine, 7 hours in a mall and all either of us purchased
was some nylons!
Monday we all got together and had a wonderful visit. We talked like we
all were long time friends. Her mom told cute stories of Mary growing up;
it is obvious she is very proud of her daughter (and rightfully so....)
made a very dear friend in Eileen while I was preparing (emotionally) to
go to California. Here I am with her and HER reunited birth daughter
on the day they joined us for lunch. Imagine, three redheads in one spot!
of the nightmares for a birth mother is the knowledge that her child may
not have had a good life. Her mom is so open and loving that any
fears I may have had evaporated.
herself reflects a wonderful childhood, good religious background and family
values. It is a tribute to this woman that she has instilled that in her
daughter and they both made me feel so welcome in their lives!
feel like I am the luckiest woman in the world!!!
are all familiar with "all good things must come to an end" and this day
did, too. I didn't want her to go and couldn't resist taking this picture
of Mary and her mom getting ready to leave at the end of the day. The tears
that overcame me were both of joy and immense sadness. Joy that all the
dreams I had for her came true and my prayers answered and sadness, well.........
is beautiful inside and out and I feel privileged to know her!
after we reunited, Mary wrote a tribute to
my mother. (Scroll down to Rhea's name.) Her birth grandmother,
Ebbelaar asked about her until the
month before her death. She would have loved this young woman.
I maintain that this reunion may very well have been orchestrated by my
mom from heaven!